Signs the Car You Just Bought is a Lemon

1. As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a
gigantic smile and high-five the salesman.

2. You notice that the car phone they threw in "for free" has a
direct line to Moe's Towing Company.

3. The booster cables are not in the trunk but are permanently
soldered to the battery.

4. The hood has been equipped with a push-button device for quick
and easy opening.

5. The "Purchased From" sticker at the bottom of the rear license
plate has been removed.

6. You get a "Good Luck" card from the previous owner.

7. As you drive up to a service station for gas, the mechanic opens
the big door to the service bay and waves you in.

8. When you leave for work the next morning, you notice a tow truck
parked about a block from your driveway. As you drive by, it
silently falls in behind you.

9. The little "Service Engine" warning signal in the dashboard comes
on and reads "It's Me Again."
--- SBBSecho 3.11-Win32
* Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - tbolt.synchro.net (1:19/33)

Signs the Car You Just Bought is a Lemon

Good list! I'll have to keep it for whenever I buy a car (likely never)

My wife asked me to pick up a single lemon at the grocery store
But I have no idea how to tell if a lemon is in a relationship or not
[It says vroom vroom?]

Walking down the road last night, I passed an apple pie, an ice cream sundae, and a lemon cheesecake.
I thought "the streets are strangely desserted tonight."

the sour notes singer: John Lemon

I don't know why people love lemons so much. Personally, I think they are sublime.

Kids: Hey dad, Don Lemon is interviewing Ice-T on TV!
Dad: Half Lemon, half Ice-T? Why didn't you just save time and say it was Arnold Palmer?
[or are you too south for this, being deep south, not just South?]

Q: Why is it better to smell roses and lemons than a pile of poop?
A: It’s just plain common scents.

Your friend,

<+]:{)}
Cyberpope, Bishop of ROM
--- SBBSecho 3.14-Linux
* Origin: The Rusty MailBox - Penticton, BC Canada (1:153/757.2)