• Teacher Arrested At Kennedy International Airport

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    From: azjohn <haboob@nothere.com>
    Newsgroups: misc.survivalism,az.politics,dfw.politics,talk.politics.guns Subject: Teacher Arrested At Kennedy International Airport
    Date: Wed, 15 Aug 2012 09:37:45 -0700
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    Teacher Arrested At Kennedy International Airport (AP)

    A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy
    International airport as he attempted to board a flight while
    in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and
    a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric
    Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra
    movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI
    with carrying weapons of math instruction.

    'Al-Gebra is a problem for us', the Attorney General said. 'They
    derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents
    in search of absolute values.'

    They use secret code names like 'X' and 'Y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined that they belong to a common
    denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
    As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to
    every triangle'.

    When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, 'If God
    had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have
    given us more fingers and toes.' White House aides told reporters they
    could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the
    President - It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.

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